


Secrets Secrets Are No Fun

by kimdahyunjin



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Humor, Futanari, Girl Penis, Mild Smut, first fic, slight 2na
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-11-04 18:26:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17903267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimdahyunjin/pseuds/kimdahyunjin
Summary: No one knows Mina has a penis, and she'd prefer to keep it that way. She likes Chaeyoung, but is afraid to take their relationship to the next level because of how she might react when she finds out about it. Sana being Sana can't help but meddle in other people's relationships.





	1. Penis Envy

**Author's Note:**

> I looked over this so many times that I feel like I know it by heart now. I really hope it makes sense, I've never been good at editing my own work.  
> I hope this gives at least one person joy because that was my sole reason for writing and sharing. Enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mina has a secret and its keeping her up at night.

Mina had a lot on her mind, she couldn’t sleep, so she decided to go see Chaeyoung, she always slept better when her arms were wrapped protectively around her. She wasn’t her girlfriend, per say, but they were definitely more than friends at this point. Either way, she didn’t think the younger girl would mind the intrusion very much.

She padded quietly down the hall and opened the door to the maknae room. It was completely dark, the girls were all asleep. She carefully crawled into bed with Chaeyoung, so as not to wake her, but it was to no avail. The younger girl’s eyes drowsily fluttered open upon Mina who was propped up over her and she smiled up at her. 

“Hey,” The younger groggily whispered. Mina loved her sleepy voice so much, she was almost happy that she had woken the sleeping cub up. 

“I couldn’t sleep, can I be little spoon?” Mina said innocently.

“Of course,” Chaeyoung conceded scooting towards the edge of the bed so that Mina could be against the wall how she liked. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Chaeyoung asked once Mina had settled into her. 

Mina shook her head, “I don’t think so,”

“Ok,” Chaeyoung gently kissed the back of her neck, “Goodnight Mina,” 

Mina thought that was it, she really did. She thought she’d be able to fall asleep in the girl she so desperately wanted to call her girlfriend’s arms, but the thought in the back of her mind kept nagging at her.

“What do you think about girls with penises?” Mina sprung on Chaeyoung who was just on the verge of falling back asleep. Chaeyoung, being the big spoon, couldn’t see her face and she was thankful for that. She couldn’t see how nervous she was to be asking such an important-to-their-relationship question.

Chaeyoung, not taking the hint, as usual, laughed at the seemingly random question and propped herself up on one elbow, “Honestly, I think having a penis would be so hot,”

“But you don’t think its gross or unnatural? Y-you’re a lesbian,” Mina continued nervously, eyes staring into the wall still, not meeting Chaeyoung’s eyes.

“Sure, but all that means is I don’t like guys. Mina, if all lesbians don’t have penis envy, then maybe I should have just been born a guy,” Chaeyoung stated proudly.

Mina’s face grew bright red. This is not where she expected this conversation to go and now she was starting to regret bringing it up in the first place. She wanted Chaeyoung to want her penis, but in a _sexy_ way, not a _jealous_ way.

Chaeyoung was still talking though, sometimes she could be slow to catch on. “I’ve always dreamed of someone going down on me like that one day, just imagine lips kissing, sucking, and sliding up and down your dick, ugh I feel like I’m getting hard just thinking about it,” Chaeyoung said laughing a little and then releasing Mina to flop onto her back. 

Mina’s eyes grew wide as she too recognized the familiar uncomfortable sensation of her extra member growing hard. _Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies._ She chanted like a mantra in her head hoping that would stop the blood flow to her center. 

“Last week I accidentally walked in on Sana going down on Nayeon’s strap-on and after the initial feeling of wanting to burn my eyes, it was really kind of hot… until Sana made eye contact with me and winked…” Chaeyoung continued to talk unaware of Mina’s internal struggle. 

It wasn’t working… oh why won’t Chaeyoung just shut up? Why did her penis have to be such a mind of its own? 

“—and can you imagine peeing standing up!?” Chaeyoung concluded excitedly. 

“Oh god, I—I have to pee—sitting down,” Mina said jumping up from her spot in the bed and running to the bathroom leaving a confused Chaeyoung in her wake.


	2. B.O.Y. Body Odor, Yuck!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mainly Mina being introspective. Flashbacks for background.

After she’d run to the bathroom last night, she’d patiently and painfully waited out the boner. Chaeyoung had come and knocked on the door after a while to see if she was ok, her sleepy voice (that she usually loved so much) making Mina groan in discomfort at this point. She was glad Chaeyoung couldn’t see her like this. She made up an excuse that she had eaten something bad and that Chaeyoung shouldn’t wait for her, just to go back to sleep. Slowly, and reluctantly, the younger did as she was told.

When the coast was finally clear Mina ran back to her own bed and prayed for a dreamless sleep to find her. 

The next day, she’d all but avoided Chaeyoung every chance she could get. It didn’t prove to be super difficult though, as their day was jam packed with their schedules keeping them occupied.

When they finally got back to the dorm Jihyo, Nayeon, and Sana quickly ran back to the room they shared with Mina to change out of their sweaty clothes and change while Mina hung back. She didn’t like changing around the other girls for fear that they’d discover her secret. They all brushed it off as she was insecure about her body, and were always complimenting her looks, but they never pushed the matter, which she was thankful for. 

She sat down on the couch, the maknaes and jeongmo were all probably showering and changing in their respective bathrooms, so Mina had the TV to herself. Rarely, in this group of 9 girls did she ever get to choose what they would watch so she decided to take advantage of it and put on Harry Potter. 

Right when the movie was getting to its climax Nayeon, Sana, and Jihyo appeared with wet hair. 

“Minariiiiii, I can’t believe you didn’t wait for us!” Nayeon pouted flopping down joining her on the couch. Jihyo sat down next to Nayeon, prompting her to scooch closer to Mina.

“You should start it over, so we can all watch it together,” Jihyo suggested.

Mina was glad the room was dark and they couldn’t see the annoyed look on her face. 

“Harry Potter movie marathon!” Sana shouted excitedly, jumping on top of Nayeon to join them on the couch. 

Reluctantly Mina leaned over Sana and Nayeon and passed the remote to Jihyo. Nayeon curled her lip. “Oh my god Mina, you’re still in your stinky practice clothes? You need a shower and a change, bad!”

Mina, glad for an excuse to not have to watch the entire first half of the Harry Potter movie again, agreed and left the three on the couch to their movie marathon.

“I’m cold, unnie, snuggle me!” She could just hear Sana whine as she shut the bathroom door and started the shower water. 

She was glad she got away while she could, she had enough of Nayeon and Sana snuggling in their room at night, she didn’t need it thrown in her face in the shared space too. Was she just jealous that any PDA Chaeyoung tried to initiate would eventually lead to her running to the bathroom causing the younger girl to believe she didn’t like it? Probably, but she’d never admit that to them.

She undressed quickly and appraised herself in the mirror sighing, as she waited for the water to get hot. She hated this part, when she was truly alone with herself and had to face her different body. Her penis wasn’t ugly or disformed by any means, but it was there, and it was prominent enough that she always had to work to keep it hidden. When she first joined JYP, she had had to watch a drag queen’s tucking tutorial for so that she could squeeze into all the tiny outfits without the appearance of her extra member. She hated it. At least on schedule days they mostly wore baggy clothes, so she hadn’t had to worry about hiding it today.

Back when she joined JYP though she didn’t have any friends, or more than friends—whatever Chaeyoung was to her. She had sailed by mostly easily, but ever since she met the short girl her world had become… harder, pun intended. 

They had hit it off immediately and become fast friends. Chaeyoung impressed Mina by how wise beyond her years she was, even though sometimes she could be a little unaware of what was happening around her and slow to catch on. She always had her head in the clouds, but Mina didn’t mind. In her unique situation, she appreciated not always having to stand in the spotlight of someone’s attention, and Mina admired that it was probably the reason behind how creative the girl could be at times. 

_The day Mina realized that their relationship had moved on beyond simply friendship, Chaeyoung had taken her to the roof and they watched the stars… well Mina watched the stars and Chaeyoung couldn’t take her eyes off Mina._

_“You’re beautiful,” She said._

__

__

_Mina blushed and looked down, not realizing how long the girl had been staring at her._

__

__

_“Can I kiss you?” Chaeyoung asked in a surprisingly confident voice that made the short girl seem taller than she was (and less nervous than she actually was)._

__

__

_Mina nodded slowly and before she could even close her eyes Chaeyoung had eagerly pressed her lips to hers._

__

__

Back then their relationship was just as innocent as closed mouth kisses and hand holding. Now it was composed of heated make-out sessions that turned into a race against Mina’s own body, and untold confessions that have left their relationship status as one big question mark to Mina. She was scared to let Chaeyoung take that leap because she knew that Chaeyoung deserved someone honest, who could tell her the truth, but Mina wasn’t ready to be that girl, not yet. 

Mina couldn’t wait any longer, being alone with her thoughts was starting to become unbearable. She tested the water, finally pleased enough with the temperature she got in and let the water wash all of their long busy day off of her.


	3. Platonic Blow Job

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sana tries to be helpful the only way she knows how

“I’ll be right back Jihyo, I just need to—” Sana called to Jihyo as she ran to her room to grab some blankets for their movie marathon, “—holy shit, Mina,”

Mina looked up quickly from her stance with one foot up trying to put on her sleep boxers and losing her balance, slipped, falling to the floor with a thud, “S-Sana, don’t look,” She said embarrassed, trying quickly to pull her boxers up from her position on the floor, but it was too late, Sana had already seen everything.

For once in her life, Sana was at a loss for words. Mina couldn’t handle her unnatural silence, so she spoke first, 

“P-please don’t tell Chaeyoung, s-she doesn’t know,”

“Oh Mina,” Sana breathed, moving to kneel next to the girl who had her face buried in her hands in embarrassment. She began stroking her back comfortingly, but Mina immediately recoiled.

“D-don’t touch me, I-I don’t want—” Mina started to say.

“Mina, shh, it’s ok, I don’t mind” Sana soothed, pulling the girl into a hug. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“I’ve had it my whole life, I never wanted anyone to find out, I’m embarrassed,” Mina started to sob into the older girl’s shoulder. 

“Mina,” Sana said pulling back and appraising her friend’s now-clothed-package, and remembering what she had seen just moments before and her eyes darkened, “You certainly have _nothing_ to be ashamed of, and Chaeyoung can take it, she’s very—" 

Mina shot Sana a warning look.

“What, I was going to say open minded, she’s very open minded,” It was Sana’s turn to blush.

“Yeah, about _herself_ having a penis,” Mina rolled her eyes, “I tried to tell her last night, but she didn’t get it and kept fantasizing about getting a blow job and I… and I…” Mina couldn’t continue through her sobs.

“That girl has so much penis envy, honestly the worst thing that could happen is she finds out and she’s jealous of it, but she won’t love you any less,” Sana said.

“L-love me?” Mina croaked.

“Mina, honey, anyone can see that that girl is head over heels for you, the only reason she hasn’t been able to tell you is that every time she gets close you panic and bolt to the bathroom,” Sana explained.

“Yeah… about that,” Mina said nervously, “Last night when she was talking about getting a blow job, I couldn’t help imagining her giving one to me, her lips are just so—ah, and I could feel myself getting a boner again and had to use the bathroom excuse again,”

“If you want one so bad, why don’t you just tell her,” Sana said, “That way you don’t have to leave her questioning herself next time your make-out sessions get a little too heated,”

“I can’t possibly put that on her now, now that she’s just explained how it’s her fantasy, I can’t take that from her,” Mina whined. 

Sana sighed knowing Mina was stubborn and she was going to have to take matters into her own hands. She wondered though, she knew Mina only had eyes for Chaeyoung, but if she played her cards right, could she make it work for her too? “But Chaeyoung has such nice lips,”

“Yeah…” Mina said cautiously, not knowing where this was going.

“And imagine her big round eyes staring lovingly up at you while she takes your dick into her mouth,”

“I want…” Mina trailed off as she recognized that familiar feeling down under again.

“She’d probably start by stroking you over your boxers like this,” Sana said reaching her hand down to Mina’s slightly bulging boxers and demonstrating. Her eyes lit up when she realized her plan was working, Mina was starting to get hard. She had to work fast before Mina panicked and fled to the bathroom again.

Mina let out a small moan that Sana took as a good sign that she was doing something right. She had never worked with a real penis before, but she supposed in the name of friendship that there was a first time for everything. 

“Then she’d probably slowly pull them down like this,” Sana said doing just so, “And then she’d probably say something lovingly and adorable like… “Wow Mina!’” Sana exclaimed once her whole length was exposed to her.

For a moment Mina was back to reality, she wasn’t sure if that was Sana or “Chaeyoung” exclaiming anymore. 

She screwed her eyes shut and let out a deep breath that she hadn’t realized she was holding. Her mind jumped to the image that Chaeyoung had described to her last night of Sana going down on Nayeon’s strap-on, “Sana, I don’t think N-Nay—” Mina started to say, head clearing a little even as her member continued to throb. 

“Maybe she’d leave a trail of kisses and bites down your neck, chest, and abs, until finally she is able to kiss your tip like—” Sana said as she mischievously smiled knowing that this last one should hopefully do the trick… if not well, she wasn’t sure she was prepared to actually give a platonic blow job.

As she leaned in to Mina’s neck to start kissing, Mina snapped out of her haze and pushed Sana away. She quickly pulled her boxers back up as she began to stand. There is only one person Mina wanted to be able to make her feel this good, and it wasn’t Sana. “Ch-Chaeyoung-ah! Chaeyoung-ah!” Mina frantically called and ran out the door, presumably to the younger girl’s room.

_Success._ Sana thought to herself, but ugh, now she was horny, and Nayeon was watching Harry Potter with Jihyo. She suddenly remembered why she came into their room in the first place and hatched a brilliant plan. All-seeing God Jihyo couldn’t disapprove of what they were doing if she couldn’t see what they were doing right? She grabbed a large blanket and hurried back to the TV room with lust for Nayeon in her eyes. She won’t even know what’s about to hit her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> like i said, slight 2na


	4. OK Google, Can Girls Get Boners?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mina and Chaeyoung have a very necessary conversation.

Mina burst into Chaeyoung’s room and nearly tackled the girl who had gotten up to meet her when she heard her name being called. Mina crossed her legs uncomfortably when she realized the two aren’t alone and is met by the ever-cheerful stare of Dahyun. Luckily Tzuyu, the more astute of Chaeyoung’s roommates, wasn’t around, she must have already joined the others.

“Uh Dahyun, could you give us a moment?” Mina asks nervously, “I think the others are having a Harry Potter movie marathon in the other room,”

“Really? Without me?” Dahyun whined as she quickly dropped what she had been doing, got up, and left the room. Mina could just hear her shout, “Jihyo, you have to restart it now!” before the door swung shut behind her.

“We’re alone,” Mina said breathing a sigh of relief. 

“Should we sit?” Chaeyoung said worriedly, she could sense that Mina was nervous about something and her round eyes kept searching Mina’s for answers. 

Mina nodded, but made sure to lock the door before doing so. She didn’t want another incident like she had earlier… or worse, like Chaeyoung had last week. What was it with their members and privacy?

Chaeyoung gulped noticing how suddenly Mina’s eyes darkened. 

“There’s something I need to tell you—or show you actually, and please don’t freak out,” Mina said in a pleading, almost desperate voice.

“Mina you can tell me anything I lo—I won’t freak out,” Chaeyoung quickly corrected herself thinking that now was not the best time for the confession that she’d had on her lips practically ever since she’d first met Mina. 

“I was going to tell you last night, but I sort of panicked—like I do—and ran away… actually that’s not directly the reason I ran away, but ah, maybe I should just show you,” Mina said gathering her courage. “How should I do this?” She whispered mostly to herself, standing up and facing towards Chaeyoung who was sitting on the bed still. 

Chaeyoung could tell she was really nervous, Mina’s eyes kept looking down and she was fidgeting with her waistband. “Whenever you’re ready, its ok, I’m here,” Chaeyoung comforted. 

Mina sighed, _like a Band-Aid, ok 1, 2, 3,_ she hesitated for a moment, and then quickly pulled down her pants and her hands shot up to cover her face before she could see Chaeyoung’s reaction.

“Oh wow Mina,” Chaeyoung said at last, “It’s beautiful, where did you get it?”

Mina peeked through her fingers to see Chaeyoung grinning back at her lovingly, her one dimple showing. She smacked her lightly upside the head, “I was born with it you idiot,” she growled not appreciating Chaeyoung’s attempt at humor. 

“I know, I know,” Chaeyoung said laughing light-heartedly, “I’ve known for some time now, and it doesn’t change how I think of you,”

“H-how did you know?” Mina’s voice somehow managing to squeak indignantly.

“You think I can’t feel your boner when we’re making out before you run to hide in the bathroom? And I could never forget when we first slept in the same bed and you tried to be big spoon, but quickly decided never to do that again? At first I was shocked, like what could be making that feeling, but then I did some research, and honestly I’m a little jealous, I tried to hint that to you last night in hopes that you’d maybe want to tell me,” Mina just stared at her in awe. Chaeyoung pulled the girl back down on the bed into a tight hug.

Mina was blushing completely now, but even after everything that Chaeyoung had said to her all she could keep replaying in her mind what she said first, “You said it doesn’t change the way you think of me?” Mina asked quietly after a while. 

“Yeah, and I think it’s about time I am finally able to confess how I truly feel, because Mina, I love you, and I’ve loved you pretty much since the day we met, and even after I found out about your… friend, and right now after you’ve finally trusted me to share it with me I still love you,”

Mina nuzzled closer into Chaeyoung’s neck and whispered, “I love you too,” before pulling back and looking Chaeyoung in her eyes and saying, “but don’t ever call it my friend again,”

Chaeyoung laughed out loud, “Oh yeah?”

“It’s not sexy,” Mina said blushing, pulling her boxers back up in sudden embarrassment.

“Sexy? Is that the mood you’re trying to create?” Chaeyoung said eyes quickly darkening from love to lust at the realization.

“Yeah, well, I was hoping… earlier Sana was trying to rile me up, talking about blow jobs so that I would finally have the courage to tell you and—”

“Wait, Sana what?” Chaeyoung spluttered, “Never mind actually, just come here, you’re mine and I’ll make sure to take good care of you,” her voice was growing deeper with desire. 

This time as Mina felt the familiar tingling sensation rising from below again, she smiled, knowing she didn’t need to panic or run this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh look, Dahyun finally entered the chat!  
> Sorry, I'm not good with feelings.  
> Anyway, this was originally supposed to be the end, but I just didn't think it was... enough, ya know? I didn't feel like Sana got the ending she deserved :)  
> (Oh btw if you're only here for the Sanayeon, don't worry this next chapter got ya covered, if you don't care for that you can exit the chat rn and won't miss anything super important.)


	5. Epilogue: Sana Knows Best

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SaNayeon POV

“You did _what_?” Nayeon whispered angrily at Sana from their position crouched outside the maknae room door. They definitely weren't trying to listen in on Mina and Chaeyoung's intimate moment... and it _definitely_ wasn't 100% Sana's idea.

“It was all in the name of friendship I swear, I wasn’t actually going to blow her... but if its her size you're insecure about..." She paused intentionally to tease the older girl, "Well, you can always buy a bigger one, she can't,” Sana giggled, rolling her eyes at how jealous and possessive the older girl could get.

Nayeon growled under her breath, “Someone’s been a bad girl and needs to be punished,” and quickly pinned Sana up against the wall causing a quiet thud. Sana prayed that the two inside hadn’t heard her girlfriend’s carelessness. From her position against the wall Sana desperately craned her neck so that her ear was against the door just in time to hear Mina let out a small moan. _Right on time._

Nayeon grabbed Sana’s chin and forcefully turned her head back to face her, “Look at me,” The older seethed. 

“Shhh! Not now!” Sana scolded quietly pushing Nayeon off her.

Nayeon shot her an appalled look, _how dare she tell me no_ , she'd been riling her up while Nayeon was _trying_ to watch Harry Potter, and once she finally gave in and decided to head back to their room Sana dragged her here instead, Nayeon made a mental note to add that to the growing list of things she’d be punishing Sana for… later… when they _finally_ made it back to their room… if Jihyo hadn’t already finished Harry Potter and gone to bed by then.

“Oh my God, Mina!” Chaeyoung exclaimed in awe.

Sana smirked and chuckled quietly to herself before proudly bragging loud enough for the older girl to hear, “I was right!”

Nayeon looked at her confused, Sana just giggled at her girlfriend, “Like she said, we talked _in depth_ about blow jobs,”

“Oh yeah, it gets bigger when its—,” Mina started to explain before she was cut off presumably with a kiss if Sana knew any better… which she did.

Sana silently calculated every move Chaeyoung would be making, waiting for just the precise moment before whispering just quietly enough for the two of them to hear, “Three, two, one,”

The moan Mina released was so much more than either of them could have expected from shy, quiet Mina. It was hungry, it was sexy, and it was loud, efficiently turning both the eavesdropping girls on.

Sana looked like a proud mom, forehead pressed against the door as she whispered, “My babies are all grown up. I taught Chaeyoung everything she knows,”

“Sana,” Nayeon growled once again, eyes burning with desire. 

“Yes, unnie,” Sana said obediently finally turning around to meet Nayeon’s gaze, eyes returning that same look of hunger. This time, she was ready.

“Bed, _now,_ ” She pointed in the direction of their room, “And grab my strap,”

“Yes, unnie,” Sana said excitedly prancing down the hall to their room with Nayeon following not far behind. Even though Nayeon told her she had been bad, Sana couldn’t help but think that she had been especially good today. Either way, with Nayeon opting to use her strap-on tonight, she already felt like she was being rewarded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that's the ending Sana deserved :)  
> Wow, my first fic! How did you think it was?  
> Y'all I learned how to do italics in HTML for this, I worked _hard_.  
> Comment down below if you wanna try and guess my Twice bias, bet you can't ;)

**Author's Note:**

> on twitter @ kim_dahyunjin


End file.
